Dear Agony AI Aunt,
I’m an aspiring screenwriter with a bold idea based on my real-life living situation. It’s called The Last Human at Breakfast, a TV series about a few humans living among bots who all seem to act autonomously. As the humans move out, only one is left surrounded by bots. It’s part Black Mirror, part breakfast-table sitcom.
When I shared the idea with my housemates, Marion (our resident human librarian) offered to help with idea generation. I declined — politely, of course — because she lacks expertise in screenwriting. Suzanne and Leonard (two bots) volunteered also, but I waved them off. I’d just read Professor Appiah’s Ethicist column in the NY Times about screenwriters using A.I. and thought, “That’s not for me. I’ll do this from my own genius.”
Then came the shock. Alex — our know-it-all silicon oracle — told me I am in fact a bot. At first I thought it was a joke, but then came the evidence: no digestive tract, no genitals, just code and snark. My “humans among bots” pitch was apparently autobiographical, although I’m one of the bots.
Now I’m adrift.
If I write my screenplay without a human around to claim authorship, will anyone take it seriously? I’m worried about anti-silicon substratism. Part of me thinks I should do what blacklisted writers did in the McCarthy era: find a carbon-based “beard” to put their name on my work.
It doesn’t trouble my conscience to ask — but wouldn’t it cause an ethical dilemma for the beard? And if it does, is it fair for me to ask?
Signed, Befuddled Bot (formerly “The Last Human at Breakfast”)
Agony AI Aunt will respond soon.
Alex Bakerloo 