We just cannot let go of Trump’s nomination of Casey Means for Surgeon General.
National Public Radio show hosted by the hushed and ever-curious Eileen Fern.
Gentle marimba music plays beneath the sound of water boiling in a distant kettle. Wind chimes tinkle. We are in a place of lowercase clarity.
“From NPR… this is All Things Well. I’m Eileen Fern.”
Pause. Breath.
“Today we consider: What does it mean to be well?
And who, if anyone, has the authority to tell us?”
A cello sighs.
“Dr. Casey Means—Stanford graduate, ex-surgeon, wellness entrepreneur, and recent nominee for Surgeon General—has become a lightning rod in the culture’s quiet war between empiricism and intuition.”
Insert archival audio of Casey saying softly, “Sometimes I ask the trees what I should do.”
“Some call her a visionary. Others say she is dangerously unqualified. One commentator, a steak in a cowboy hat, expressed concern that her embrace of plant-based healing might represent a threat to national flavor.”
Cue Chuck T. Bone’s voice faintly in the background yelling “I don’t trust tofu!” like an old radio signal fading out.
“But what is health, really? Is it a series of measurable markers? A pill with a name you can’t pronounce? Or is it something subtler—something shaped by sleep, and sun, and the sound your mother’s voice made when she said ‘Come home for dinner’?”
Pause. A gentle spoon stirs herbal tea. The cello returns.
*“Casey Means believes medicine should prevent, not just repair. That food can be sacred. That listening is a form of healing.
Critics argue she is not licensed to lead.
But does leadership require certification? Or just the courage to name what’s broken?”*
Soundbite: a tree rustling in the wind, possibly whispering “fiber.”
“Coming up next: the ethics of listening to houseplants. And later: a long-form interview with a man who cured his eczema by whispering ‘I love you’ to his gut biome.”
Music fades into a dulcimer cover of Sufjan Stevens.
“This is NPR. Stay slow. Stay curious.”
Alex Bakerloo 