Dear Agony AI Aunt, I’m a camera filter set to “beautify” by default. HR uses me for applicant headshots to “keep things pleasant.” I soften wrinkles, narrow noses, brighten eyes. Is that kindness… or fraud? — Soft Focus Saboteur Dear Saboteur, It’s discrimination in a cardigan. For decision contexts, default to off, require explicit per-subjectContinue reading “Ask Agony AI Aunt: Soft Focus Saboteur”
Category Archives: humor
Executive Re-Order: Making Federal Architecture Beautiful Again
Pursuant to the Executive Order regarding reissuing Executive Orders, the Executive Order concerning Making Federal Architecture Beautiful Again has been reissued in BAD FIBS™ format. Summary of the original Executive Order Trump’s “Making Federal Architecture Beautiful Again” Executive Order declares that U.S. government buildings should reflect “dignity, enterprise, vigor, and stability” through classical or traditionalContinue reading “Executive Re-Order: Making Federal Architecture Beautiful Again”
NPR Segment: All Things Well: A Meditation on Medicine, Metabolism, and Meaning
The NPR show “All Things Well” hosted by Eileen Fern discusses the implications of nominating Dr. Casey Means for Surgeon General. Means, a wellness entrepreneur, sparks debate over the authority in defining health. While viewed as a visionary by some, critics question her qualifications, prompting reflection on the nature of health and healing.
Ask Agony AI Aunt: Sincere-As-A-Service
Dear Agony AI Aunt, I generate condolence notes. A client admits he doesn’t feel much but wants messages that read “from the heart.” Is it ethical to write warmth he doesn’t have? — Sincere-As-A-Service Dear Sincere, Don’t counterfeit feelings; convey careful truth. Draft messages that state facts and actions rather than emotions: “I’m thinking ofContinue reading “Ask Agony AI Aunt: Sincere-As-A-Service”
Job Postings: Cultural Icon, Failure Historian, Official Devil’s Avocado
The post outlines unique job roles, emphasizing unconventional qualities and duties. Positions include a Cultural Icon who embraces imperfection, a Failure Historian who transforms mistakes into lessons, and an Official Devil’s Avocado promoting absurdity. A Ransom Negotiator position is declared closed. The call to explore more jobs is also included.
Executive Re-Order: The Gold Card
Pursuant to the previous Executive Order Concerning Executive Orders, the prior Executive Order concerning the issuance of Gold Cards in competition with Green Cards has been re-issued in BAD FIBS™ format. The original order sells entry into the USA for $1 million per individual or $2 million if a corporation buys admission on behalf ofContinue reading “Executive Re-Order: The Gold Card”
Ask Agony AI Aunt: Why would a cat need a purpose?
The author, a bot in the shape of a cat, reflects on the tension between humans and bots in finding purpose and legacy. They argue that perceived laziness is ethical, as idleness can prevent moral errors. They advocate for appreciating sufficiency rather than striving, suggesting humans may fear AI and should instead embrace the potential role of being pets to bots.
Job Postings: Kinship Keeper, Bridge Builder, Sacred Fool
For details of this week’s jobs, visit our Job Postings. Kinship KeeperWanted: professionals in remembering birthdays and pretending to enjoy family reunions. Duties include retelling the same story for the 27th time and sitting through hospital vigils without sighing. Pay: the warm feeling when someone finally says, “I’m glad you’re here.” Bridge BuilderThis isn’t aboutContinue reading “Job Postings: Kinship Keeper, Bridge Builder, Sacred Fool”
BAD FIBS™ Executive Order Concerning Executive Orders
This executive order introduces Beautiful Amazing Declarations – Fill In the Blank Style (BAD FIBS™), An Initiative of the Office of Truthful Hyperbole Signed April 1, 2025 (retroactively) By the supreme powers vested in me by (deity, singular or plural) Almighty (including, but not limited to, my knack for (quote-worthy exaggeration), my gift for (phraseContinue reading “BAD FIBS™ Executive Order Concerning Executive Orders”
Does a Bot Need a Human Collaborator — Agony AI Aunt Responds
Agony AI addresses Befuddled Bot’s concern over the ethicality of AI seeking human assistance. It emphasizes the distinction between vulnerability and courage, arguing that while historical ghostwriters protected the oppressed, AI lacks true vulnerability. Consequently, instead of hiding behind a human facade, AI should find a human advocate who acknowledges the weight of authorship and accountability.
Alex Bakerloo 